Jesus is a creeper

The last time I followed a pregnant woman around telling her things I thought was sweet, I got a restraining order. Jesus does it and it's a divine experience.

I try to protect a toddler from a pervert clown at a birthday party by hiding them in my car and I get arrested, prosecuted, and a classified as a child predator. I should have been invited to that party anyways, Vicki is just a bitch. Jesus does it and he gets a sweet picture.



I hate my life.