So I guess emailing us is now the cool thing to do.
Dear Assholes,
I was going to compose a long, hateful email message about how distasteful and revolting your website is. However, I feel that, as a woman, I am above such actions. Therefore, I have decided to compose an acrostic poem instead.
Appalling
Slum
Sucks
Hateful
Ostentatious
Lame
Example (of something bad)
Stupid
You're welcome.
Insincerely,
Your avid reader
P.S. I will blow J-Geazie and/or Shakhak for five dollars (each). I have a paypal account... and a P.O. Box... and an apartment.
P.P.S. I'm desperate.
P.P.P.S. and hot.
Our Reply....
Dear Avid Reader,
Since you took the time to come up with such a beautiful poem, I thought I would take some time and reply to your email. I want to tell you that the creativity your poem oozes is extraordinary, but you could have come up with something better for 'E'. Obviously you're not the average acne faced cum guzzling slut like most of our avid sleeve wizard reading sluts, you used the word Ostentatious and I don't even know what the fuck that means. So you're an outstanding acne faced cum guzzling slut with super hero like powers. Sucking golf balls through garden hoses, chrome off of trailer hitches and the virginity out of prepubescent little boys. Thank you for the poem and I hope you continue to enjoy our slum sucking hateful blog!
P.S. I'm pretty sure that only one of your three PSs are true. It has to be the first one. There is no doubt in my mind that you'll take a steaming sleeve of wizard protein injection into your wide open mouth, chewing it cheeks so chubby that it makes a hungry hungry hippo feel good about himself. Since your obviously willing to do this, your not desperate, anyone will unload the cum clip into a ogre's mouth. And since sucking the magical mayonnaise out of the unicorn horn is about all you do, it's obvious that your ashamed to strip down and grab your ankles like the good looking girls. I know you love that midnight snack before going to bed, but playing with my balls will only keep me around for so long.
With loving compassion,
Shakhak
Love Us? Hate Us? Let us know: teamsleeveofwizard@gmail.com
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
Email 2.0
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2 comments:
I'm sorry, but my co-blogger Shakhak is right.... I'm past the point where I'm satisfied with lying to fat chicks when I say I'll tell you when I'm about to blow my wad and then laugh when the chick is vomiting up my jizz... I need more... I am to the point in my life where I want to lie to fat chicks when I say I'll pull out and blow my wad on your chubby stomach and then I'll laugh when I ignore their calls and delete their messages that tell me I owe them money for an abortion. If your not willing to give that to us.... well, then I guess there is no need for me to waste my 5 bucks.
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